HOW RESILIENT ARE YOU? HERE'S HOW TO BUILD YOUR RESILIENCE.

What is resilience? 

How fast do you bounce back from setbacks or how well do you cope when faced with a negative situation? Let's talk resilience. Resilience is the ability to bounce back or recover from the challenges of everyday life. But how easy is it? Given the severity of an experience or the availability of some kind of resources, it can be difficult to cope. Some people may become hopeless or easily resort to unhealthy copying mechanisms but a resilient person is able to cope effectively regardless of whatever situation they may face. 

From time to time, we must face tough situations not only from an individual level e.g job loss, abuse but also from a societal level such as the COVID-19 pandemic and this may affect how we recover from those situations. Our ability to effectively cope with these challenges is what is called resilience. The resilience theory proposes that resilience is not a fixed trait meaning it is something you can build overtime. It isn't something you were exclusively born with, rather, it is developed the more you deal with daily stressors. It also states that resilience is not a constant; at times you may effectively cope with a challenge but this may not be the case when you encounter a different type of stressor. 

Types of resilience

There are different types of resilience which can affect a person's ability to cope with various life stressors and this includes: physical resilience, mental resilience, emotional resilience and social resilience.

Physical resilience

This is how our body adapts to change and recover from illnesses, injuries and physical demands. This type of resilience is directly related to our physiological health and affects how people age and cope with physical stress and medical health. We can build on this by being conscious of what we eat, getting enough sleep, exercising etc.

Mental resilience

This is the ability to psychologically handle and adapt to life's adversities and challenges. People who are psychologically resilient have mastered copying strategies that are adaptive and help them to cope with whatever life throws at them. 

Emotional resilience

This is the ability to be aware of your emotions and manage them effectively without letting them overwhelm you. People who are emotionally resilient have developed ways to regulate themselves emotionally which helps them to cope with stress in a healthy, positive way. 

Social or Community resilience

This is the ability of communities to recover from life threatening situations and disasters. It is fostered through coming together in solidarity after a disaster, looking for ways to solve their problems, identify the potential risks they face and harness efforts in safeguarding their community's interests and wellbeing. 

Factors that affect resilience

1) Social support- A social support network can tremendously increase one's resilience when going through tough times e.g having a family, friend, community that you can always run to when faced with problems. 

2) Emotional regulation- People who are able to regulate their emotions are shown to be more resilient than people who do not know how to self regulate. 

3) Self esteem- People who view themselves positively and believe in their capacity to handle anything are shown to be more resilient than individuals who are not. 

4) Copying skills- Developing copying skills and problem solving skills can help one cope with stress and recover from adversity. This may include being able to reframe negative experiences or sharing with a trusted counterpart. 

5) Communication skills- People who clearly communicate and express their needs are more resilient than individuals who lack these skills. This is because expressing your needs helps you to get the support you need and the resources necessary to meet life's demands. 

Resilience, Mental toughness and Mental strength.

Resilience is used interchangeably with mental toughness and mental strength. Resilience is the ability to recover from setbacks, mental toughness is the ability to tune out distractions and negative criticisms and mental strength is one's capacity to persevere. They are closely connected in that, to recover from setbacks, there's a certain level of perseverance or endurance one needs to emulate. And to bounce back from setbacks, one needs to learn how to tune out distractions and negative self talk. Thus, all these aspects could mean one and the same thing.

How do you become more resilient?
  • Develop self awareness - The first step is to recognize how you cope when faced with challenges. This is by examining your patterns on how you normally respond to stressful life situations as this will give you insight into what areas you need to work on in order to cope effectively. 
  • Learn how to self regulate - It is important to know how to deal with your emotions anytime you face an overwhelming situation as this will help you to stay grounded. Some of the ways you can regulate your emotions is through deep breathing exercises, practising mindfulness activities, engaging in self reflection and developing and practising routines. 
  • Work on your communication skills - Learn how to clearly communicate your thoughts and feelings as this will help you get the support you need to solve your problems. Nonetheless, it prevents problems even before they start.
  • Develop copying skills - Build healthy copying mechanisms that help you to handle any kind of challenging situation you may encounter such as exercising, taking walks, journalling, dancing and engaging in your hobbies. 
  • Focus on what is within your control - When faced with challenging situations, it's easy to feel frustrated and ruminate over negative thoughts but when you start to reframe negative experiences, you start to feel more in control. For instance, you do not have enough resources to undertake a particular task, instead of thinking that you are at a disadvantage, you begin to think that it would be practical to maximise on the available resources you have and undertake the duty to the best of your ability. Through this, you will feel empowered to perform the task as best as you can.
  • Create a strong social support network - A social support group can be family, friends or a community and it builds one's sense of belonging to which an individual can feel safe to fall back on during times of crisis and conflict. 
  • Work with a mental health professional - When things become too heavy, it is okay to admit that you need help and seek professional help from a therapist. Part of being resilient is through asking for help and getting the support you need in times of adversity. 

Take out 

People who are resilient do not experience less stress but they are able to tap into their inner strengths, copying skills and available resources and use them to recover from setbacks and adversities. They have a strong self efficacy meaning they are confident in their capacity to change their circumstances through their decisions and abilities rather than being a victim to circumstances that are out of their control. And resilience is not something hard to get by but we can always develop it by remembering the factors that build resilience and applying it whenever we face life's challenges.

Article by, 
Therapist Faith Chepkwony
chepkwonyfaith13@gmail.com


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